Waking Up

This is a response to a letter from someone who felt victimized, belittled and ignored in her relationship. "We are here to wake up and stay awake in a sleeping world. Life is a journey of worldly forgetting and spiritual remembering. Our ego learns victimization, because it believes weakness is the position of power.

You are powerful. Your True Self is powerful. Your Essence is created by your Creator. Our ego convinces us of our "less than" or "greater than" position in life and in our relationships. Our learned impotence is not the Truth. Our Power is not of this world. Our Power is our Spiritual essence, Love.

You are not a victim. You are a strong, capable and loving person. You can choose the relationship you want. You can choose who to love and how to love. When you do not choose, you are giving the other person permission to make the decisions.

Most men do not want to decide on the form of the relationship. They fear criticism. Most men do not have a relationship plan. They often stick with the comfort of the present. Most men do not understand or honor feelings. They often feel with their thoughts. Most men do not speak the language of woman. They speak the language of action. "What can I do?" Most men want their woman to be happy...to have no problems or complaints. Most men do not know what to do when the woman is unhappy. They want to make it go away. Most men feel guilty and responsible for the woman's unhappiness. Rather than listen, they try to fix it. The guilt causes them to want to withdrawn or blame the one about whom they feel guilty.

Male female relationships require a willingness to learn from and about the other person. It is important to discover their expectations, their ideal picture, their usual way of communicating, their fears and their intention. It is equally important to discover and share the same about yourself. When you know, understand and accept the differences, you are open to learning how to create a relationship that works in everyway. Getting our own way will always create a declining relationship. These are some tips to awaken and perhaps bring a new way of seeing and being together.

Loving you, Betty Lue

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